Weekend Plans? w/ your elitist judge mj3528 (and links)

• Seacrets is awesome, esp mid day. Tons of bikinis, everyone is hammered. Good time
• Thats where we seen this chant
• 
  

https://www.instagram.com/p/CUBaymksuFb

• Horseback riding: You are guaranteed one ride per day, and can join the standby line for additional rides if they have horses available.  We ended up riding once Monday and twice Tuesday.  They take like 30-40 people out at a time, split into 3 groups by experience level.  We were in the beginners group, which means the horses remain at a walking pace.  The lack of speed got a little boring, but the kids en-joyed it.  You ride for about 45 minutes through trails in the woods.  We saw a fox on the last ride, which was kind of cool; no other wildlife or anything particularly exciting but I like being in the woods so it was fun.  On one of the rides, P2's horse was being kind of an asshole and he sort of panicked a little bit which resulted in him dropping the reins. The horse stepped on the loose reins and ended up breaking it.  So the ranch-hand lady that was leading our group had to put his horse on a rope and lead him the rest of the way.  He still seemed to enjoy himself.  Also my wife rode a horse named PJ.
• Mountain Tubing: You sit in a tube and ride down a hill.  Like sledding, but without snow.  It was fun.
• Riflery and Archery range: They had 4 BB guns with various metal targets to shoot at - mostly cowbells and horseshoes - to give you a nice satisfying PING when you hit them.  P1 was a pretty good shot, especially considering he'd never held a gun before.  On Sunday afternoon there was a lady there that was just embarrassing me with her shooting skills.  I had a difficult time with the sights on 3 of the guns, but managed to get the 4th one zeroed in eventually.  I think I'd have held my own against this broad if she showed her face again, but I had to settle for just being a better shot than my kids.  Neither of the kids did an especially great job of pulling the bow back far enough to get any consistent power in their archery shot, but the target was only like 20 feet away so they still managed to hit it sometimes.  Overall it seems like shooting was their favorite activity of the weekend.
• Laser Tag: I forgot how fun this game is, tbh.  We should do it more often.
• Indoor/outdoor pools and slides: There was a big heated outdoor pool with a volleyball net set up at one end, as well as 2 big waterslides and a smaller slide/splash pad area for little kids.  The big slides were better/faster than they looked.  Fun for all ages.  Also a poolside bar where they set up an appetizer station with free "cocktails" (a super sugary rum punch) available from 3-4PM every day.  I drank like 7 of those on Monday, almost got a buzz, and had a pounding headache the rest of the night.  Indoors there was another pool, another little kids' area, and one more big slide.  Also a huge indoor/outdoor hot tub, which was basically just outdoors but you could enter it from inside.  There was room for like 2 people to sit in the indoor part of it.  Gas firepit next to the hot tub too.  We hung out in that area with a coupla few beers till like 9:00 both nights.
• Sports and stuff: Mini golf, shuffleboard, ping pong, basketball courts, baseball field, volleyball court.  We played 3 rounds of mini golf; I shot the exact same score (22 on 9 holes) all 3 rounds, winning twice. P1 allegedly shot a 20 the second round, but I think he was shaving strokes.  Shuffleboard was fun; I hadn't played that in a coon's age.  We played some wiffle ball on the diamond, which was fun until P1 tried to throw the ball up to himself and hit it, while P2 was walking towards him from like 5 feet away.  I could see the whole thing unfolding but was powerless to stop it, and he drilled him square in the face with the bat.  He's fine.
• Bungee jump and rock climbing: Not actual bungee jumping, but those trampoline things where they put you in a harness attached to bungee cords so you can jump really high and not kill yourself.  The boys spent a lot of time here.  I bounced once and successfully navgated the Medium rock wall; I was one grab away from the top on the Hard wall and lost my grip.  Probably should have tried again, but I pussied out.
• Entertainment: Sunday night they had a show with a dude doing yo-yo tricks.  All the kids in attendance loved it.  It was a little long maybe, but the dude actually did some really cool stuff.  I've seen far worse shows.  Monday night's show was some dance nonsense, so we skipped it.
• Arcade: I believe this was the only thing in the whole place (besides booze) that you had to pay extra for.  Somehow we got out of there without partaking.  This is truly a miracle, as the arcade is typically the thing my kids are most interested in pretty much anywhere we've ever gone.

• Breakfast: Buffet with the usual stuff - pancakes, french toast, scrambled eggs, bacon/sausage, fruit, yogurt, etc.  You could also order omelets, fried eggs, or benedicts from the kitchen.  Everything was delicious.
• Lunch: Buffet in an outdoor picnic area.  A lot of BBQ on both days' menus, plus a salad bar, bugers/dogs, chicken fingers, and the like.  Yesterday's brisket was excellent IMHO.
• Dinner: Normal sit-down service with a different menu each night.  I risked a NY strip on Sunday night; it was meh, and defiitely the worst meal I had the whole time.  I had short ribs Monday, and enjoyed it muchly.
• Snacks: A little lacking IMO.  The 3:00-4:00 poolside appetizers were the only opportunity to eat anything between meals.  I guess that was fine because I ate a ton of food at lunch both days.  But my kids are snackers and weren't really hungy at lunch time, so they were whiny in the afternoons.
• Booze: There was a poolside bar in the afternoons, bar service available with dinner, and a bar open from like 6-9 I think.  I didn't partake in any of these (other than the free run punch I mentioned above) because we brought a bunch of beer.  There was nothing advertising whether you were allowed to BYOB, but they gave absolutely zero fucks about people walking around with beverages that they clearly didn't buy there.  We brought solo cups, but there were people with open containers and no one batted an eye.  

• Horseback riding: You are guaranteed one ride per day, and can join the standby line for additional rides if they have horses available.  We ended up riding once Monday and twice Tuesday.  They take like 30-40 people out at a time, split into 3 groups by experience level.  We were in the beginners group, which means the horses remain at a walking pace.  The lack of speed got a little boring, but the kids en-joyed it.  You ride for about 45 minutes through trails in the woods.  We saw a fox on the last ride, which was kind of cool; no other wildlife or anything particularly exciting but I like being in the woods so it was fun.  On one of the rides, P2's horse was being kind of an asshole and he sort of panicked a little bit which resulted in him dropping the reins. The horse stepped on the loose reins and ended up breaking it.  So the ranch-hand lady that was leading our group had to put his horse on a rope and lead him the rest of the way.  He still seemed to enjoy himself.  Also my wife rode a horse named PJ.
• Mountain Tubing: You sit in a tube and ride down a hill.  Like sledding, but without snow.  It was fun.
• Riflery and Archery range: They had 4 BB guns with various metal targets to shoot at - mostly cowbells and horseshoes - to give you a nice satisfying PING when you hit them.  P1 was a pretty good shot, especially considering he'd never held a gun before.  On Sunday afternoon there was a lady there that was just embarrassing me with her shooting skills.  I had a difficult time with the sights on 3 of the guns, but managed to get the 4th one zeroed in eventually.  I think I'd have held my own against this broad if she showed her face again, but I had to settle for just being a better shot than my kids.  Neither of the kids did an especially great job of pulling the bow back far enough to get any consistent power in their archery shot, but the target was only like 20 feet away so they still managed to hit it sometimes.  Overall it seems like shooting was their favorite activity of the weekend.
• Laser Tag: I forgot how fun this game is, tbh.  We should do it more often.
• Indoor/outdoor pools and slides: There was a big heated outdoor pool with a volleyball net set up at one end, as well as 2 big waterslides and a smaller slide/splash pad area for little kids.  The big slides were better/faster than they looked.  Fun for all ages.  Also a poolside bar where they set up an appetizer station with free "cocktails" (a super sugary rum punch) available from 3-4PM every day.  I drank like 7 of those on Monday, almost got a buzz, and had a pounding headache the rest of the night.  Indoors there was another pool, another little kids' area, and one more big slide.  Also a huge indoor/outdoor hot tub, which was basically just outdoors but you could enter it from inside.  There was room for like 2 people to sit in the indoor part of it.  Gas firepit next to the hot tub too.  We hung out in that area with a coupla few beers till like 9:00 both nights.
• Sports and stuff: Mini golf, shuffleboard, ping pong, basketball courts, baseball field, volleyball court.  We played 3 rounds of mini golf; I shot the exact same score (22 on 9 holes) all 3 rounds, winning twice. P1 allegedly shot a 20 the second round, but I think he was shaving strokes.  Shuffleboard was fun; I hadn't played that in a coon's age.  We played some wiffle ball on the diamond, which was fun until P1 tried to throw the ball up to himself and hit it, while P2 was walking towards him from like 5 feet away.  I could see the whole thing unfolding but was powerless to stop it, and he drilled him square in the face with the bat.  He's fine.
• Bungee jump and rock climbing: Not actual bungee jumping, but those trampoline things where they put you in a harness attached to bungee cords so you can jump really high and not kill yourself.  The boys spent a lot of time here.  I bounced once and successfully navgated the Medium rock wall; I was one grab away from the top on the Hard wall and lost my grip.  Probably should have tried again, but I pussied out.
• Entertainment: Sunday night they had a show with a dude doing yo-yo tricks.  All the kids in attendance loved it.  It was a little long maybe, but the dude actually did some really cool stuff.  I've seen far worse shows.  Monday night's show was some dance nonsense, so we skipped it.
• Arcade: I believe this was the only thing in the whole place (besides booze) that you had to pay extra for.  Somehow we got out of there without partaking.  This is truly a miracle, as the arcade is typically the thing my kids are most interested in pretty much anywhere we've ever gone.

• Breakfast: Buffet with the usual stuff - pancakes, french toast, scrambled eggs, bacon/sausage, fruit, yogurt, etc.  You could also order omelets, fried eggs, or benedicts from the kitchen.  Everything was delicious.
• Lunch: Buffet in an outdoor picnic area.  A lot of BBQ on both days' menus, plus a salad bar, bugers/dogs, chicken fingers, and the like.  Yesterday's brisket was excellent IMHO.
• Dinner: Normal sit-down service with a different menu each night.  I risked a NY strip on Sunday night; it was meh, and defiitely the worst meal I had the whole time.  I had short ribs Monday, and enjoyed it muchly.
• Snacks: A little lacking IMO.  The 3:00-4:00 poolside appetizers were the only opportunity to eat anything between meals.  I guess that was fine because I ate a ton of food at lunch both days.  But my kids are snackers and weren't really hungy at lunch time, so they were whiny in the afternoons.
• Booze: There was a poolside bar in the afternoons, bar service available with dinner, and a bar open from like 6-9 I think.  I didn't partake in any of these (other than the free run punch I mentioned above) because we brought a bunch of beer.  There was nothing advertising whether you were allowed to BYOB, but they gave absolutely zero fucks about people walking around with beverages that they clearly didn't buy there.  We brought solo cups, but there were people with open containers and no one batted an eye.