Post by BSMB on Aug 16, 2021 14:57:53 GMT -5
Went with wife and child so you can probably just skip this, there is nothing interesting in the incoming wall of text. PJ might hate-love the covid blurb though.
Left Charleston for San Francisco, white's cousin just had a baby so we spent 2 days there seeing her and doing a quick tour of SF. I didn't think it was as bad as people say, but it definitely has a scent and there are a lot of homeless (unhoused). Saw Alcatraz, Lombard St, Ghiradelli, etc. Had some sushi, etc. Surprisingly lax on the covid stuff. I think i had to put a mask on to go into a couple of stores but otherwise it was pretty indistinguishable from SC rules. We're on to Maui-natti.
BUT FIRST: A quick sidetrack comment about Hawaii's covid protocols. Holy shit, what a goddamn racket. The white and i are vaxed so we were able to skip "quarantine" (10 days, aka the entire vacation) by uploading our vaccine cards to the state website and jumping through a couple hoops. NBD. The boy however, he had to take a covid test. The rules are:
1. it must be less than 72 hours prior to your FINAL departing flight to Hawaii (EG, we flew SFO-LAX-OGG, so 72 hours prior to the LAX flight taking off)
2. it must be a PCR test
3. the kicker: it must be done by a "TRUSTED PARTNER" of the state of hawaii. they have a list of like 12 vendors. One is Walgreens and all the rest are these weird little clinics that are mostly west coast or test-by-mail.
Walgreens NEVER has an open spot available for this particular test. It's not the same as the regular "do i have covid' walk-in test, since you are taking it for travel and not because you are sick. So I call the local Walgreens and explain, lady on the phone says sure just walk in, we'll test you. Get there with the boy and the woman in the pharmacy is "no, this must be done online and you cannot make an in person appointment." Now we are fucked because we're about to fly to San Francisco and all the other approved testing centers are west coast or test-by-mail. As i breathlessly research, i find out that ALL of them are like $200 and insurance cannot be used, except Walgreens, and Walgreens mysteriously never has open appointments (none in the CHS area, none in SF, none in Oakland, none in San Jose, etc). Eventually i find a random hawaii approved clinic in SF that has an appointment open and they do a fast test (not PCR, and i'm like "hold up, Hawaii says this has to be PCR" - they say, no, we promise this will get you into Hawaii, we do this all the time...). So for $200 the boy gets a fast result (took under 5 minutes and we had a negative test result and they uploaded it to Hawaii's site for us). 400 words to say: this whole thing was a fucking scam for the Hawaii government to wet their beak. There was a guy in the quarantine section of the Maui airport when we got there, raising hell about how he had a negative PCR test from CVS in his hand and how the hell is it different from any other PCR test, etc. Poor bastard. Also the "quarantine section" was just a bit of rope. Solid job of keeping the rest of us from being exposed to his CVS covid.
ANYWAY: rental car place was a mess, they were driving cars straight from the car wash into the next renter's hands. I got a classy silver Chevy Impala, think it was a 2019. We drove to our condo in Kaanapali, little rain storm made rainbows all over the island. Very cool (jake). Food truck rodeo right on the other side of our condo so we did that, it was delicious (i had spicy ahi poke, kid had fish/chips, white had regular ahi poke).
Day 2 we drove up to the fancy resorts to snorkel. About an hour. It is amazing how close everything is by mileage and how FAAAAAAAAR it is on the drive. Everything's a 1 lane road and tons of switchbacks/low speed limits. This is a theme. Snorkeling was great, i burnt the fuck out of my back.
Day 3 we went to the national park. White wanted to do the waterfall hike. IT TURNS OUT, you cannot just put the national park main entrance in your gps and get to the right place. We ended up scaling the volcano in the car, realized after we were at the top that the entrance for the waterfall stuff is on the opposite side of the park around a 3 hour drive away. So we did the volcano hike, which was probably my favorite nature thing on the trip. Huge crater, extreme changes in climate/environment every quarter mile, crazy views, etc. Kid died on the hike back up, probably because of the 10,000 ft elevation, so i had to carry him. Calves were sore the rest of the week. If you're keeping track that's a sunburnt back and sore calves so far.
Day 4 we did snorkeling again (kid loved it and demanded more), this time at Honolua bay, supposedly the best place. Honestly i thought it was better up by the resorts. Water is COLD in honolua, and it's very rocky so getting into the water is tricky. After that we did some surfing at a little beach up the road which was very nice/secluded. No worries about getting yelled at for being a haoli. Never had one of those encounters on this trip.
Day 5 we drove back to the national park to do the waterfall tour this time. The drive to that entrance goes around the uninhabited side of the island and the road is fucked up. dirt, a single lane for both you and the oncoming traffic. Beautiful though. Waterfall hike is awesome, bamboo forest (invasive species!), 400 foot waterfall, etc. The pools at the base of the falls were closed for covid but that looked like it would have been pretty fun. Decided to take the road to Hana back to our condo, that is a magnificent drive but you want to be a passenger for the ride. Driving, you are white knuckling the whole time through blind corners into single lane bridges with oncoming traffic, hairpin turns up and down cliffs, etc. The parts i did see were incredible though, Jurassic Park imagery. This day was about 6 hours of driving for me.
Day 6, pool day, drank many gay boat drinks, i love a lava flow.
Day 7, Luau day. Did the Feast at Lele, it's a 5 course dinner where they do a little island show for each course. New Zealand the clear winner with the Haka. High recommend if anyone decides they want to do a Maui luau, it's like $150/person plus tip, all inclusive.
Days 8-9 we did some shopping, beach/pool, went back to my Paia fish market for another tuna.
Flew back on the red eye, that is SOMETHING buddy. 12 pm flight out of Maui, only 2 total hours of layovers in LAX/ATL, arrived in CHS at 9 am the next day (Thursday). I am STILL waking up at 2 am like it's morning. Anyway, Maui's very cool and besides the covid scam it was very hospitable and fun times.
